Bright Tal via flickr

Image: Bright Tal via flickr

I’m a little behind on the blogging.

So, Saturday marked 17 weeks and today marks 4 months.

Today was fine; distracted by all the Inauguration coverage & a vet visit for Leo. Last night was actually the harder part. I don’t know why it hasn’t really struck me as much as it did last night, but last night, marks 4 months since the last conversation I ever had with my mother. While I saw her alive the day she died, we didn’t exchange words that morning. I think the last thing I said to her was “Good Night,” but I’m not sure–and I hate that. I wish I remember better. I think she had asked me if I wanted to go get something to eat, even though it was 11 o’clock on a Friday night. Occasionally would we do that; go out for food. But that night, I said, “no,” and that I had to be up early to help out at a volunteer thing. And then I think I said, “Good night.” What I really wish I remember was what her last words to me were, but I don’t. And with each passing day, week, month, the chances of me remembering fade. Last night I struggled to accept that. I don’t know that I ever will.

But 4 months. How time flies.

PS…as for Saturday/17 weeks, I got to mark it with a parking ticket. I’m ticked! I was at Starbucks & parked in their lot, which does have signs saying 1-hour parking; but who really takes those things seriously. Yes, I take time restrictions seriously on city streets, but I find the ones in parking lots, on weekends, completely stupid. It’s not like the lot was even remotely filled. I take solace in the fact that I wasn’t the only one, but still, I think I may have to find a new Starbucks.

Image: Bright Tal via flickr